Life doesnt begin at 30, dont let anyone tell you different, I feel hurt and embarassed bec he doesnt reply to my text. If it isn't, then do what you want. Um, not if you don't let it. To M. it seems like it's J. some women who are attracted to women, not the majority. Ive broken up with him 3 times in the 6 yrs we`ve been together, But always take him back cos im a (sad) and lonely single mom. You have to trust him because you have no choice. I think you need to face up to that and . and i understand exactly what youre saying but when you do talk to him you have to have to bring up his drinking and your concern of him not calling. But this is volunteer. I envy those who can go out. I feel for you. It J. seems silly to worry when there is J. nothing to worry about. But if you notice that these things are happening more frequently, whether it's you or your partner who's doing them, they could be red flags that all is not well. I would not judge, unless it was something a man or woman was doing to pick up one night stands.. BTW I can say that the majority of women I know are attracted to women as well (even if they don't act on it) so should they be banned from everyone=)Advertisementif(typeof ez_ad_units != 'undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[320,50],'mamapedia_com-box-3','ezslot_4',679,'0','0'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-mamapedia_com-box-3-0');if(typeof ez_ad_units != 'undefined'){ez_ad_units.push([[320,50],'mamapedia_com-box-3','ezslot_5',679,'0','1'])};__ez_fad_position('div-gpt-ad-mamapedia_com-box-3-0_1'); .box-3-multi-679{border:none !important;display:block !important;float:none !important;line-height:0px;margin-bottom:5px !important;margin-left:auto !important;margin-right:auto !important;margin-top:5px !important;max-width:100% !important;min-height:50px;padding-bottom:20px !important;padding-top:20px !important;text-align:center !important;}. Jealousy comes from a lack of trust. nah. I saw some people I know and I guess we go there enough, some of the staff know M. by sight. It is all about intent. I want him to be with M. because he wants to, not because he isn't allowed to go and meet anybody else. Luckily for us both, neither of us are the 'bar/club going on a regular basis' kind of people. I actually encourage my husband to go out with his friends though.. He would attend the lingerie shows there and take pictures with the girls who apparently knew him by 1st name. Our relationship as a family is great, we all get along, ex-wife included. Me and my boyfriend have talked about how we felt several times that we trust eachother so much to the point where if i dont talk to him for three days and i know hes at some crazy parties, i wont feel so worried and we trust each other so much that we both openly said that we could kiss other people if we wanted because truly we both know it wouldnt be real and that we love each other. It seems like you really enjoy the attention so maybe your current relationship isn't up to par? My bf WAS texting me from the bar, but that has tapered off. If I wanted to go out to a bar with a bunch of girlfriends my husband would tell M. to have a good time and same for himthey guys go for a drink after work, sure join them (J. let M. know so I don't have dinner waiting). Let's face it - we all know bars can be totally unconducive places for relationships. While they can be highly effective in reducing pain, they also come with a high risk of addiction and overdose. This is emotionally manipulative behavior. But when I'm home, I'm usually out with himbecause I miss him! I love him but he doesn't seem to put any effort. He asked it so much I feel he was thinking I was lying to him. But it got old. Yes I allow my husband to go out without M. no matter the gender. Started Saturday at 12:43 AM, By evenworse Suggest your wife that she can have time for herself too. Nearly everyone is guilty of giving their phone or other electronics too much attention from time to time, but if your partner is always so entrenched in what's going on elsewhere, it could be because they're no longer invested in what's going on between the two of you. I guess I'm J. a prude, then, because I believe there are better places to hang out than bars and that if you are married or committed and have children, your time is better spent with them. Sorry - J. reality in my world - you haven't made a LIFETIME commitment to your boyfriend - hence the fact he is bf and not dh. You likely question yourself asking whether it's something about you . Even in a long distance relationship, especially, in a long distance relationship, there has to be respect for trust to continue. I have been there a few times for lunch alone to do some of my paperwork and did not want to have to cook or clean up at home. I love my wife dearly, but I wouldn't go to a bar or restaurant with a member of the opposite sex alone. Method 2 Keeping Yourself Occupied 1 Organize a night out with your own friends. I cook for my friends (plural). I read a story and call it. I can tell you as a man, that he appreciates that, it shows trust, it shows that you are trying to grow in the relationship, and it shows that you love and care that he take time for himself. I did it again. and yea i dont agree with how much he is going out and getting drunk. It is so **** hard that I can't leave but I know I have a choice and it is difficult. It's one thing for your girlfriend to go partying without you and another for her to go without even informing you. Started January 19, By That's a different matter. My boyfriend and I met in Australia a few months ago after traveling Thailand together we both went our seperate ways, whilst remaining in a relationship. I have also felt the "most women are bisexual" opinion to be not true in my circles. Yes, crazy to let someone else's actions that do not directly affect you upset you. My Long Distance Girlfriend won't video call with me. I wouldn't want to tempt her or her M.. Good relationships are too hard to come by and I wouldn't want to jepordize one. If it becomes a constant thing of going ot the bars all the time and it eats into your time with him, which is what my bf wants to do, then you may have something to worry about. HE needed the excitement is what he told M.. Do what you feel is right. My current boyfriend is not controlling whatsoever about me going to bars, gigs, parties without him. He said what he meant, and he meant what he said. So I asked him and he said the girl bit him. So if you know your husband goes to the townie bar, gets all excited to see the regulars, cheers when people walk in, picks ladies up so they can feel girly, and flirts, then yes, you shouldn't feel bad to do the same as long as you are both feeling happy about it and having fun. 2023 BDG Media, Inc. All rights reserved. Right now, it seems he's being attentive to your needs. Dont laugh but normally I go out with my girls to the karaoke bar or this diner/ bar thing where we live, my spouse to Hooters (ew) or the sports bar and we dont have issues because its planned in advance and we know who the other person is hanging with. My friends and I have often discussed how we don't "get it" that supposedly most women like women. But there's obviously cases where the spouse is comfortable with the environment like you described J. M. so I don't see an issue. Clubs and bars are not a place for someone in a relationship unless you're there with your partner to dance, have fun, and show the world who you're deeply in love with. That means, he wants to reassure you that a) he didn't go home with some bar floozy and b) he got home safely. It can feel like a never-ending cycle of disappointment and rejection, leaving you wondering if you'll ever find a meaningful connection. *Could* I go to a bar w/out my spouse? Now, like I said..if this changes, and he starts wanting to go more, like my bf is, and it cuts into your alone time..then yeah. Hope your ok x. He asked for nothing in return. The answer isn't to NOT go to the bar or NOT get on FB. try it, be honest, truthful, and if its meant to be, its meant to be. Go out one night and iignore his calls till the next day and then just say oh sorry baby I was wicked drunk. since I'm an adult no one LETS or ALLOWS M. to do anything. So no, we don't go to bars and not J. because we don't drink but we also don't go to strip places either and we definitely limit the amount of contact we have alone with the opposite sex. Sex is often a part of healthy, committed relationships, so if you two aren't getting intimate anymore, that might be an indication that something's not right. She doesnt mean ask permission. Not just change the rule without saying something and then she can choose to keep playing or quit. But even if I could go out it wouldn't be to a bar. To avoid another broken heart caused by dating insecure men, here are 15 signs of insecurity to watch out for. Big difference. There's really very little I can do to *make* him act with integrity and honor, besides doing so myself. Like whatever, I love him so much that I could do anything for him but who am I to fool I can't stand this any longer. Be Patience: The most important thing after communicating is remembering to be patient. I'm in need of help my boyfriend and I have been dating go a year and a bit he rang me telling me he going to a work do and that he would call in the morning I hqvent from him since I have his wallet and everything I'm so worried he might be cheating on me what do I do ?? I don't say that he should stay with me all the time, but he can send me a message from time to time. Tech Organizer. If my husband is going on a site visit alone with herhe usually tells M.J. in case I get a call he is out and about with a young blonde female that is not M.lol. Without being juvenile or sophomoric about it. Maybe you happen to have a lot of bi-sexual friends. My husband will not go out to bars or clubs without M., he thinks it is wrong and makes him uncomfortablein his defense he is devilishly handsome and gets hit on like no one I have ever seen, so I get where he is coming from. Then ask yourself if he really cares what you do. "But if your partner has started going out more and leaving you at home, that could indicate that they've got one foot out the door. BUT, remember, he is out, don't go ballistic if you don't hear from him, and leave him alone while he is out. before we were married my wife went out with her friends every couple of weeks to the bar seen. Im sorry for saying all this, its not that i dont trust you its just i'd prefer you to be honest with me and tell me the truth rather than putting up with everything, it would make it easier for the both of us and our relationship! Needless to say, the abuse of such substances can negatively affect decision-making. Nah, I've never hung out at a bar alone. I was always like, I can't help it, we're in a bar and apparently I'm a hot commodity, ha! What are your feelings on that? I could understand drinking a little too much, but once you reach the level of passing out that borderlines alcoholism. That being said we aren't glued at the hip and I am not his mother, so if he wants to hang out with his buddies or I want to go out with my friends for a girls night, neither of us has a problem with it. On weekends I don't have my kids, I . xx. Enjoy those evenings when he is out and look forward to the next time you see him. That's different. When you do that, she will want to stay home with you because she'll be afraid of losing you. I'm personally not attracted to women. Anyway what are your thoughts on the above situation? He has the right to have a life, gosh. Do the same to him hun. I go to a bar every once in a while, for a drink , by myself. All this woman wants to know is if her boyfriend is going out, because when you care for someone, it just nice to know. Covering Phoenix, Mesa, Glendale, Scottsdale, Gilbert, the valley . 2. This could be a sign of cheating because he is projecting onto you. 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